Last night, the total in the Motor City Bowl was set at 70. At the Crowne Club we had our biggest play of the Bowl season so far on the UNDER. Offensively, Florida Atlantic has averaged 25 points per game this season, and Central Michigan has averaged 30. The combined offensive points total 55 -- far under the posted total. Defensively, Florida Atlantic has allowed 29 points per game, and Central Michigan has allowed... Read more

It's a Chistmahanukah freebie from the Crowne Club. They call this game the Hawaii Bowl, and one of the teams is Hawaii, which may, if you are clever, tell you a little something about the home edge in the game. My proprietary information sources tell me that very, very few students will be jumping in their cars and driving from South Bend to the Aloha Stadium (Don't you wish you had great informatioin sources like me... Read more

The early bowls are best known for their "surprise" results. In many cases, however, the often aberrational results of the minor bowls are easily predictable by picking losers instead of winners. Some of you are no doubt saying, "I have no problem picking losers. It's winners that are the problem." The secret to picking the minor bowl winners, however, lies in picking the losers; and there are some secrets to doping out... Read more

"If you can't beat 'em, join 'em" I always say because I love over-used gibberish. So, I've decided to become Irish just like those winners O'Bama, O'Shea, O'Luck. and O'Marco (certain people only need a first name). Here it is, my very first O'Crowne selection of my life. You can call it the GAME OF MY LIFE, but my life is pretty ordinary, so we'll hold the hype down to ordinary levels.. WASHINGTON REDSKINS +2 over Dallas... Read more

The definition of stupid is someone who can't learn, even from experience. Put a rat in a maze and give it electric shocks when it goes the wrong way and it will quickly learn the maze. Not the KC Cheifs' Chief Coach Herm Edwards. He keeps making the same mistake over and over and over again. He keeps failing but he still can't seem to learn. That is true stupidity. It's probably not his fault. He was likely born stupid... Read more

That leprachaun laddie, Barry O'Bama, gave his first press conference today, just 3 days after he won the election. That's not bad considering President Wimpy didn't hold his first press conference for 3 YEARS after he was elected, and then it was to tell us all about how he, Georgie Porgie, would single-handedly bring Osama Bin Laden, of the Bush business partner Bin Laden's, to justice. Oh, well. It was an auspicious... Read more

It was a wonderful day for the O'Shea's, O'Lucks and even Bill O'Reillys of the world yesterday, as one of their own, Barry O'Bama beat the Scotsman and was elected President. For those of you who are sad that Sarah the PILF (P for Politician) won't be winking at them from the centerfold of the Congressional Record, take another look at Jill the Trophy Wife -- spouse of Joe the VP. She even has long blonde hair, as opposed... Read more

Once upon a time, Cockey Hockey was walking past the ice rink, when all of sudden . . . a puck smacked him right in the puss. Immediately, Cockey Hockey ran to Goosey Loosey's house and proclaimed, "Goosey Loosey you must come quick! The pucks are flying, the pucks are flying." Then Goosey Loosey and Cockey Hockey ran to Ducky Lucky house. "Ducky Lucky! Ducky Lucky! The pucks are flying, the pucks are flying!" cried Cockey... Read more

10 SIGNS THE ECONOMY IS IN TROUBLE 1. Your bank has stopped giving away toasters, and is now selling them. 2. When you move, your house sells for less than your dining room set. 3. Your mortgage company is offering you free gifts if you will just make your mortgage payment. 4. You bought $200 of your local bank's stock, and they just nominated you to the Board of Directors. 5. Your balance at the gas pump is higher than... Read more

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times." -- Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities I t was the best of bets, it was the worst of bets -- Rob Crowne, A Tale of Two Bets The Crowne Club lived through a shizophrenic weekend. After winning in the Breeders' Cup 14 out of 16 years, picking up one of the biggest payouts in Breeders' Cup history two years ago, and winning 71% of their races bet last year, the Wall... Read more